HS Chapter 116: The hopeless sister joins in with her little sister.

Author’s notes: I didn’t expect to use more than 100 chapters to get this far, and I’m sorry you’ve had to wait. Hopeless sister’s update. And then again the chapter’s title is a spoiler… Because this was the only title that came to mind.

---

“”….””

… The mood is awkward. This is bad, what do I do. I wanted to make Koma aware of my feelings, however.

“(I’ve managed to keep it under wraps for so long… And now, I overenthusiastically opened up about how much I like Koma…)”

What happened to be like this. I became too passionate, and a bit too much… I’ve come out about all sorts of crazy things that could destroy our sisterhood (e.g.: habitual spy photographer, using Koma’s saliva to make mouth-bite sake, collecting Koma’s hair as a good-luck charm while cleaning, sniffing and licking clothes before washing them, putting them in my mouth, etc.).

As I said, I did talk honestly. I told Koma we should have a heart-to-heart talk, but… I didn’t think that I’d talk about this stuff so much.

“Aah… Uhm. That…”

I can’t see Koma’s face properly. I don’t know what to say to her because of the awkward mood… Why did I tell her all of that stuff so earnestly…? Am I an idiot. Nuh, I was a complete idiot… Ah, my self-deprecation…

“…. Uu.”

Apparently Koma feels the same way and has been busy turning red and pale without trying to look directly at my face since a while ago.

Uumu. It is very rare to see Koma this much upset, and it is refreshing and endearing to see Koma that shows an unexpected side of her character. If I’m allowed to, I’d like to take a picture of her right now and use it as material for this evening—- Come on, what am I thinking about right now, am I an idiot… Un, I’m an Onee-chan who’s stupid and hopeless without having to confirm it…

“… As you’ve heard, Nee-sama.”

“U, ueeh!? Wha, wha, wha… What is it, Koma!?”

I was half panicked and Koma, who was often in silence. Surprising the first one to cool off… As I thought, it was Koma. She clears her throat lightly, then turns to me (and her face is still as red and cute as an apple) and resumes talking.

“I, Nee-sama. I’m the kind of woman Nee-sama heard.”

“Such as?”

“I said… The real me has romantic feelings for Nee-sama. In fact, I was sexually aroused by Nee-sama. Repeated stalking behaviour, including constant snooping and eavesdropping, out of a desire not to have Nee-sama stolen… This is me.”

“Ah, un. That’s what you meant. It was a bit of a surprise to Onee-chan that Koma was like that~” 

“…You were a bit surprised… That’s just it?”

“Nh?”

Just that… What?

“More… I think that you’d be more astonished? Please. Tell me honestly how you felt when you heard what I just said, Nee-sama.”

“Honestly?”

With a serious face, Koma asks me to do so. Fumu… Honestly telling her what I thought about when I heard Koma’s coming out…

I didn’t want to tell you because it would be embarrassing and might make Koma feel bad about it, but… It’s a request from Koma, of all people, so I’ll be honest with you then…

“I got it. Then, I’ll be honest with you.”

“… Yes, please do so.”

“What I thought when I heard Koma’s coming out—-”

“….Yes”

“…. I felt an affinity… I think?”

“…. Yes?”

Koma found my answer was somewhat unexpected, literally dots for eyes and gave me a dumbfounded look.

“Af-affinity? What you thought about what I just said… It’s affinity? …. Uhm.  Was Nee-sama properly listening to me?”

“Un, I listened without missing a single word, but so what?”

“… So, what? Why does Nee-sama have such a strange impression…? Normally, you’d be taken aback or… You’d hate me, you’d get angry with me, you’d think I’m weird… You’d despise me and so on? And yet you said ‘affinity’ to my story… I’m sorry, but I don’t understand Nee-sama…” 

“Even if you ask me…” 

My, it’s because that’s how it is. She was completely unaffected by my coming out, and on the contrary, I was surprised that Koma was also my kind (i.e. an immoral, perverted homosexual in love with one half of her twin) and that she had been in love with me for a very long time, just like me. That’s even better than affinity for me.

I mean, it’s just too convenient, so I’ve been a bit nervous inside that this might be a dream, or that Koma is making fun of me, or that it’s a surprise…

“Be taken aback? I’d hate you? Get angry? I’d think bad? I’d despise you? … Me? It’s not possible at all. Koma has always had feelings for me, to the point where she’d stalk me, right? That would mean you’re in love with me? From Onee-chan’s view, I’m actually happy that you do!” 

“…”

“Or rather to begin with, I love Koma, and as I’ve already told you, I’ve been committing perverted acts that are even worse than Koma’s, so… That, I think we’re the same… I’m relieved that I don’t have to be guilty of doing something wrong… Ah, ahahahaha!” 

I’ve exposed myself so openly and so much, I have nothing to fear and nothing to lose now. I’ve decided to take initiative and smile while answering honestly.

Koma hearing my honest feelings, in relief—-

“… You’re lying.” 

“Fueh!?”

“… I’m sorry. I don’t like the idea of doubting Nee-sama… But, you have to be. I don’t believe it.” 

—- Instead of doing so, her expression became even more grim. She mutters something like that. Eh?

“It’s a lie… And I don’t believe you, you say… Eettoo, Koma-san? What? Where? What part of what I said you don’t believe?”

“Just about everything… Especially the fact that you like me as a woman… I don’t believe it. I can’t believe it…!” 

“That’s the most important part, and the part I want you to believe in the most!?” 

‘I love Koma’ is the major premise of my story, and if you don’t believe that, we can’t continue onwards in many ways!?

“Wait a bit, Koma!? Did Koma properly listen to my story!?”

“… Yes. I listened to Nee-sama’s story without missing a single word.”

“Then, why!? Then you know how I feel!? I told you few minutes ago!? I told you how much I like you, and how much I like you to the point of being put off!?”

“… I don’t believe it.”

“Please believe me!? Please! I can’t express it in numbers!? My love for Koma is without limit! Leaving the other things, I don’t think there’s anything to doubt about my love for Koma!?”

“… I’m not able to believe it.”

“Whyyy!?”

I desperately try to show that I love Koma, but it seems that Koma stubbornly refuses to acknowledge my love. I’m starting to want to cry. Gununu…. What do I do. How do I get her to believe my love for her…?

“(I might go to prove my love by going back to my room and collecting all the spy photos and wiretap records I’ve collected so far… Or, I’ll get my poetry book, in which I’ve written about my love for Koma, and I’ll show it to Koma.)”

But that could make Koma draw aback seriously this time… Even if she doesn’t draw aback, Koma will try to fight me, saying, ‘That’s normal. I did this and that.’, like our coming out earlier, trying to rival me this way or that… If that happens, it’s going to complicate things again.

Think… Is there something else…? What is the best way to prove my love for Koma…?

“…. I don’t understand.”

“Fueh!?”

And so, next to me, who was trying harder than ever to turn my hollow head and think about how I should prove it, Koma mumbles a few words alone. I don’t understand, what…?

“For me… There are plenty of reasons to like Nee-sama. There’s so many that I wouldn’t even cover them in an hour.”

“T-There are that many…?”

“Yes. Like today, for example, where Nee-sama has saved my life many times without taking a second thought for herself. No matter where I was, no matter how far away I was, Nee-sama would always find me, dashing into my need for help like a hero… I fell in love with the bravery and coolness of that Nee-sama.”

*Cough*, Koma. The only reason I was able to appear so heroically in Koma’s hour of need was thanks to an unauthorized wiretap I had planted in Koma… If I reveal how I did it, it’s not cool at all, Koma…

“But, that’s not all. Six years… No, ever since I was born, Nee-sama has been fully devoted to me. You took my taste disorder more seriously than I did, learned to do household chores for me and cooked for me. And to restore my sense of taste, you kissed me day in and day out, without a hint of disgust. I’d been always moved by Nee-sama’s unfailing kindness as we exchanged sweet, debaucherous kisses.”

*Cough*, Koma. It’s true that I haven’t shown a single disgusted look as I kiss Koma to restore her usual sense of taste back into her mouth, but… I think I probably have made lewd looks. Onee-chan doesn’t think it’s the kindness that’s bottomless but the lewdness.

“The times I’m lonely. When I’m in pain. When I’m desperate. At those times, Nee-sama senses the changes in my heart and sends me warm words and hugs me tightly.The warmth of Nee-sama, who is like the sun, wraps me and warms my cold body and soul at any time… You’ve always healed me.”

*Cough*, Koma. Not just when the Koma is lonely or in pain or desperate… Regardless of these changes in Koma’s mind, I think I would have hugged Koma anytime, anywhere, with a sniffing *Haa, haa*, clear ulterior motive.

“The dignity, strength, kindness and warmth of that Nee-sama. I admired Nee-sama. I was feeling my heart beat fast… I’ve fallen in love with Nee-sama.”

“Th-That so…”

What do I do… I’m so happy that my loveable Koma likes me that I want to cry, but I feel like the reasons she likes me are all very much beautified by Koma’s lenses…

“… Now, I understand why I fell in love with Nee-sama. I understand… But, on the other hand, I don’t get… why Nee-sama likes me.”

“Eh? Why I like Koma?”

“Yes. That’s the part I don’t understand the most, I don’t understand it at all… Nee-sama. Nee-sama told me that you like me… What parts do you like about me?”

Koma said that she didn’t understand earlier… Could it be that? She doesn’t know the source of my love for Koma?

“My appearance? Or that I can study? Maybe that I work out? Don’t tell me that you fell in love with my personality?”

“Eh? No, that’s…”

“… If that’s the case, then all of it is an act, I’m sorry. It is only temporary.”

“Haa?”

I think Koma’s looks, academics, athleticism and personality are all good things about Koma, but… That’s temporary? An act? Eetto… Which ones?

“My appearance has only been improved to make Nee-sama like me. A good example is my hair, which Nee-sama always compliments me on. Nee-sama said to me a long time ago, ‘Women with such straight, long hair are beautiful. I admire them’… From that day onwards, I grew out my short hair, and then spent hours trying to keep my hair in place… That was my goal, to have Nee-sama like me.”

“….”

“I heard Nee-sama say, ‘I’m not a good student, so I respect people who can study’. From that day on, I began to study hard…. That was my goal, to have Nee-sama respect me.”

“……”

“I heard Nee-sama admiringly saying while watching TV, ‘I’m not good at exercise, so when I see people who can exercise, I think they’re cool’. Since then, I’ve been frantically training my stamina and skills so that I can excel in any competition… So that Nee-sama will say to me ‘Koma exercising is lovely. You’re cool’ and praise me, that was my goal.”

Koma shakily continues her story and talks more. I kept my mouth shut while making an angry look unconsciously.

“Personality, too… I was playing the part of someone Nee-sama would like, that’s all. Pure, innocent, honest, kind and strong-minded girl to the core— I played the good little sister only in front of Nee-sama in the hope that you would like me… That was all!”

“… Hey, Koma.”

“I’ll ask again. What is it about me that you like so much? The real me is not a perfect superwoman. I’m a timid, weak, lonely, cowardly, jealous, obscene, intolerant, such a useless little sister! Nee-sama, Nee-sama who doesn’t know that, that’s why—-”

“… Even if that’s true.”

Before Koma finishes, I interrupt her firmly. Even if it’s Koma, like I’ll let her say anymore than this.

“… Even if that’s true. All up till today, Koma spared no effort just to play the ‘awesome little sister’ who would be respected by me. It’s not something you can do normally. However talented you were, to show me your best parts— I don’t believe you can keep playing the perfect sister just for all of that. I earnestly respect you. You’re amazing, Koma.”

“…Eh?”

Koma’s sentiments, apparently, were that the story so far was meant to make a bad impression to me. Too bad, Koma. In my opinion, my liking for Koma, which I thought couldn’t possibly go any higher, is growing.

“Wh, y…? You’re not disappointed…”

“Where. You’ve worked so hard for me? Then of course I’d be happy. I’m not disappointed or anything like that at all.”

“But, but…”

Koma is looking clearly confused. I’m going to keep talking, too, as if I’m pressing and not letting Koma talk. Now it’s my turn, Koma.

“Koma did say it just now. ‘What is it about me that you like so much?’ and ‘I don’t understand why you like me.’. Okay, then I’ll teach you!”

“….!”

“Your appearance, academic ability, athleticism and personality. I like all of this about Koma, but… What I love the most about Koma, it is…”

“Most you love, it is…?”

“It is you making a healthy effort towards your goals!”

“Y, es…?”

Oddly enough, the point Koma was self-deprecating was the main reason I thought I liked her.

“Maybe Koma thought she was able to hide it. I’ve been watching Koma ever since she was born as my little sister. I’ve watched you everywhere, all the time… That’s why, I know. I know how hard Koma has worked to get here.”

“You know…?”

People say that Koma is a perfect superhuman. Actually, I think they’re right, but that’s probably not the right word to describe my little sister. Because, Koma, she’s been making an effort to be.

“You see, I. I know that Koma started growing out her short hair, and that she worked so hard combing it every morning in front of the mirror. If you don’t understand something in the class, you continue to work on it until you do… I know you’ve been studying till the crack of dawn. From the day you lost a running race to a boy in your class in primary school until you beat him…I know you used to run in the school yard every day after school, even though you had blood blisters. I know that you really weren’t good at socialising, but you tried your best to learn honorifics to make a good impression.”

“…. a, e…? Wh…? Lies… Saw… eh, e?”

“Umusu. I’ve watched you clearly, Koma.”

“…….”

And I also know that Koma didn’t want to show her great effort to others. How could I, a (stalker wannabe) who loves Koma, not know that, though. 

When she hears me talking like that, she turns red in the face before my eyes. You’ve worked hard to get me to like you, and you’ve hidden that effort to play the perfect superhuman… It’s embarrassing you that I’m the one who saw it all.

“Watching Koma up close, I really respected you. I thought it was very beautiful to see Koma absorbed in putting effort… I didn’t understand it at the time, but maybe that time when I was looking at Koma—– I don’t think I liked you as a family, I think I liked Koma as Tachibana Mako.”

“….”

And since I heard why she was making the effort, it was to get me to like you… I’m falling more and more in love with Koma. I couldn’t possibly be disappointed in Koma, even if I were dead.

“U, u, u, u…. It’s a lie! That’s not it! It’s wrong! It’s because Nee-sama is kind. Because you’re really kind… As a sense of duty as my older sister, or guilt from six years ago, or the four years of trauma I had instilled in you, or sympathy for me… You’re telling me that you like me!”

Shaking her head in desperation with a blush on her face, Koma again denies my love. Mu? Leaving aside the six year guilt… My four years of trauma implanted by Koma…? Aah, now that I remember, I went overboard and let it slip through last month with Kanakana, Koma… One of my things that I couldn’t confide in anyone else—-

‘For four years, I listened to Koma’s nightly ramblings and self-loathing.’

— You found out about it. Aah… I see. Certainly it’s no surprise that Koma would suspect me of my love if she overheard that conversation.

“…. Okay, I got it. Then let me be honest with you, Koma.”

But… No, that’s why I have to make sure my thoughts are properly conveyed to Koma.

“It’s true, I feel a lot of guilt towards Koma, as Koma says. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel remorse or regret. Every time I kissed Koma on the mouth, my heart was filled with apologies. I have to admit it was hard to listen to Koma’s ramblings for four years. It was traumatic and demeaning. How useless I was, worrying and worrying.”

“….”

“But. Don’t get me wrong, I want you to listen. I’m not saying I like Koma because of guilt or trauma.”

“…..eh?”

Good grief. Koma is supposed to be very smart, but I don’t know why she doesn’t realize how simple this is.

“Please think about it. No matter how much duty, guilt, or trauma, or regret I felt… Do you really think that an older sister can be so devoted to her little sister just because of that… She wakes up early every morning, makes breakfast and lunch, and then gives her little sister a ritualistic kiss. Kissing the same way for lunch and dinner, and kissing separately for snacks— Do you really think I could do that every day for six years without missing a beat?”

“T, that…”

“Koma really believes that an older sister who has no feelings for her little sister can usually carry on doing such bizarre things on a yearly basis?”

“a, uu…”

I’ve been doing that sort of thing for a long time, and I can’t honestly say I’d be able to do that. It’s because I like Koma. Because I love her… I’ve been able to kiss Koma without fail for six years because of that.

“Truthfully, I’ve liked Koma for a long time. But because I felt guilty and traumatised towards Koma, I’ve been hiding my feelings for her until now with a death grip. I was deceiving my own love. ‘My love can never be fulfilled’ like that.”

“Th… at, me… too”

“That’s why I’m so late. I’m sorry, Koma… My coming out earlier was just me going overboard and confessing with no care for mood or anything like that, so you’ll have to forgive me if it’s no counting.”

Having said that, I get serious and take Koma’s hand… I am so nervous that my heart is about to jump out of my mouth, but I look straight into Koma’s eyes and tell her.

“Let me say it again. Tachibana Koma-san. I, Tachibana Koma-san… I like you. I love you. Till now, and from now. I will always love you forever. Please go out with me.”

“~~~~~~!”

…… Okay. I said, I said it. I finally told her…! See! I’m a self confessed hopeless person, but I’m also a woman who does things when she has to!

This is my very own once-in-a-lifetime confession. Koma starts muttering in a daze, as if she is dreaming.

“…I… I… I’m probably so perverted that even Nee-sama will be surprised…? I want to embrace Nee-sama, sexually, you know…?”

“Oh, what a coincidence. I’m actually a dirty, perverted Onee-chan who wants to do perverted things with Koma too.”

It’s a lot easier if I know that Koma is a siscon who understands the side of things. All the best, because there is no need to endure it.

“…. I, I’m the one who traumatised Nee-sama and turned her into a servile character…?”

“Thank you. The thought of being trained by Koma to have a servile personality turns Nee-chan on so much.”

Well, if Koma feels responsible for that… I’d be happy for her to train me again. This time, not as a servile hopeless- But, a honest woman. I’m not ashamed to show it anywhere, and I’m proud to say that I’m the sister of Koma.

“… I’m, really a useless… useless human being…?”

“Then, I’m glad. I’m a hopeless person too, so we’re just the right amount of mutually hopeless couple.”

In the first place. We’re identical twins. There’s only 1 start. That’s why, Koma, we… The two of us should be enough to make one person.

If the two of us could make up for what we lack and support each other as a hopeless couple… That could be amazing, wouldn’t it?

“…. Now then, that… I… I’m a siscon who takes Nee-sama’s lips in the guise of taste disorder or punishment… I’m a hopeless little sister…?”

“I want you to feel relieved. I’ve always been the kind of spoiled Onee-chan who thinks a lot about making things up and only thinks about kissing with Koma. Also—”

“Also…”

“—– I’m already a terrible Onee-chan who takes her little sister’s lips without any reason, so there’s no problem.”

“ah…”

Having said all that, I put my own lips on top of Koma’s lips, without giving her any kind of notice to do so.

… That’s right. I’ve kissed Koma so many times in my life… They were kisses under the guise of ‘to restore the sense of taste’ and ‘for punishment’. Oh, and did I mention that even the first kiss was ‘to get Koma to eat food’.

Then, maybe, this very kiss… It will be the first kiss for me and Koma. If I think about it, we must have done it a thousand times over… We’re supposed to be more used to it than anyone else, but strangely, we’re the most nervous we’ve ever been.

My and Koma’s kiss… It felt very sweet and sour, even though I didn’t use any apples as a catalyst.

“… Koma, the reply for my confession. Whenever you want… Any reply to it, is fine for me.”

Me, who lightly overlaps my lips and then lets go after less than five seconds. Dangerous… If I’d been 0.1 seconds slower, I would have wanted to push her all the way to the end. First, I have to wait for Koma’s reply…

“… In that case, I’ll reply right now, Mako-nee-sama.”

“Huh?”

“….. If you’re fine with me, then I’d gladly…”

With that reply, Koma wept with joy— She shed tears I hadn’t seen in six years until now, and took my lips with a big smile on her face.

---

Author’s notes: II think the next chapter will be an epilogue. I know it’s a bit early, but thank you so much for reading this far!

Translator notes: Wow, I’ve finally reached the official epilogue of the hopeless sister, now I wonder if I should continue with the SS volumes of this series. I feel like I won’t rest peacefully if I don’t do otherwise, so we’ll be seeing the SS volumes. And after I caught up with them, I’ll probably do another series and onwards till something serious enough happens to me that would make me halt translating.